Today, to quite the contrary of yesterday, was horrible. for the most part.
Instead of feeling enlightened and free by the idea of today being the last day of my life, rather it went either ignored or used as an excuse to get no where.
It was enough to make something VERY clear. Keeping the mindset HONESTLY is DIFFICULT

It is very easy to convince ourselves that "tomorrow I can just do better" BUT that's the whole point isn't it. I find myself momentarily thinking of ways to make it so tomarrow "really" is not guaranteed... but in that ive missed the point.
Tomorrow is NOT guaranteed. this is the very idea I am trying to pound into my brain, this is the concept I am trying to make REAL for myself.

This will be no easy task. But I will try.